Back in September, I began praying for clarity. Funny thing: clarity came. In big sweeping waves, small little waves, ripples, whispers and wind gusts, clarity came. What I had not thought about or prepared for was that with clarity comes disruption. It feels as though no part of my life has gone untouched.
I’m really grateful for the clarity. After all, it’s what I asked for. Getting to the root of things, seeing things through fresh eyes, understanding people and circumstances in a whole new way is incredibly valuable. But of course, disrupting your whole life in response to all that… well, it’s hard. It’s required courage I didn’t know I had and an emptying and letting go of a lot of what I thought I did have.
As a contemplative, fully committed to the transformative process, this is life. I long ago abandoned my original quest in pursuing spirituality, which was to feel good. There’s nothing wrong with feeling good, of course, but we compromise ourselves when we make it the goal. Discomfort, however unpleasant, serves a necessary purpose. It shines a light on whatever needs healing, in our selves, in our communities, in our world.
It has been my experience that the more we try to make things comfortable, the less comfortable they become. Seeking comfort above all else requires that we stop naming and acknowledging whatever is true and present in favor of whatever we would like to be true and present and this creates deep dissonance within our being.
As we are in the midst of the Lenten season, I’ve been reflecting on my own understanding of this time, which is that it is a form of justice to the Divine, self, and others and that it is a time to call things what they are. In short, it’s about our relationships. How is our relationship with the Divine? How is our relationship with our Self? How is our relationship with the world-at-large? Are there opportunities for healing? Are we calling things what they are? (As opposed to what we’d like them to be?)
One of the many blessings of the new leadership structure here at SKY – from a hierarchical model to a cooperative model – has been the space created for being in relationship in an examined way. The four of us have made commitments to the studio and each other that include giving and receiving feedback, practicing radical vulnerability and honesty, and holding each other to account in wholeness and love. Sometimes, this is comfortable and easy and sometimes it is uncomfortable and hard, but effortless or difficult, it is always healing.
This structure and our commitments are just an extension of our collective and individual yoga practices, moving us deeper and deeper into relationship and mutuality with All That Is, our Selves, and each other. It is our hope and intention that this radiates out into our community and invites everyone who passes through our doors into this space of being held in wholeness, where we are better able to allow for clarity to shine its light on all the opportunities for healing and justice that exist both within and without our beings.
When I co-founded this place with Pamela I was aware that I was seeking healing, for others and myself. Co-creating this place was in and of itself a healing act (the meaning of our name!). Going on 6 years later, what continues to delight and surprise me - and bring me to tears quite frankly - are the myriad of healing acts that we are able to bear witness to and participate in on a daily basis. And I am healed every single time I walk through that wonky glass door. Our vision is lived out and fulfilled each and every day by all of you when you courageously name things as they are. As you seek your own healing in community, you are contributing to and inviting each member of that community - including, and especially us - into their own healing. Thank you.
Mutual healing for all!